On this page we want to share some of the feedback we've received from mums about their birthing experiences.

If you would like to share your experiences with other parents please email contributions@forparentsbyparents.co.uk.

Firstly we are delighted to say that the results of our recent maternity services questionnaire were very positive. 80% of the 130 respondents were very positive about the standard of care they had received during their pregnancy and the birth and there was high praise for the medical staff concerned. Click here to read the results of the questionnaire.

Your views and comments

At the age of 43 I became a mum again, Stuart was not planned but neither my husband or I would be without him. His sisters are 22 and 20 years old and are chuffed about their little brother. All my deliveries were elective caesareans ( I have a narrow pelvic opening) When I had my daughters I was in hospital for 8 days each time, but with Stuart I was allowed home on day 4. As an experienced mum I was happy to be going home but for a new mum I feel this was not long enough. After a section you are sore, uncomfortable and moveing about is slower than usual. I was lucky my husband and youngest daughter was there to do everything else. I concentrated on Stuart, getting rest and eating the meals made for me.

Sandra

I had a horrendous birthing experience at University Hosiptal of Hartlepool. A long labour followed by augmentation followed by emergency c section - Midwives were useless, no pain relief offered!

I always seem to read on the Internet and in magazines about negative birth experiences in hospital. I would like to counter balance that by saying that I had a very positive experience. My baby, which is my first, was born in the University hospital in Durham. As it's a relatively new hospital the facilities were excellent and I was allocated my own ensuite room for the whole duration of my stay.

I am now an incredibly happy mother who is enjoying motherhood and my 6 week old baby and I actually look back fondly at my birth experience.

Claire

I would like to share my experience of a home birth. Our daughter was born at the local hospital nearly four years ago. The experience was fantastic. Being a first time mum but also a nurse I had no personal experience of giving birth but was privileged to be present at a few births in my training. We had decided to do the sensible thing and have a hospital delivery first time around. The whole experience was amazing. I had a fantastic old school assertive midwife which I needed at the time. I had my sister with me who instinctively knew what I did and didn't want and a husband who was stunned into silence by the whole experience. Olivia was born after 8hrs a long soak in the lagoon bath and no pain relief at all. My bits remained intact and I was up to going home the next day.

Miles was born eventually after still only 8 hrs but taking some time for his head to descend. I think the threat of a hospital transfer mid delivery and turning on my side helped. Again I delivered intact and with no pain relief. The only slight downside was that we spend most of the rest of that day at the hospital waiting to have him checked over as the midwife spotted he had a problem with his bits that will need correcting later. To see our daughter's face the next morning was a picture! She slept through the whole thing. She came into the bedroom smiling looked in the moses basket and said happily who is that!"

Tansi

I gave birth to my fifth son about 5 months ago and it was a really good experience. I was told about all the complications that I could encounter and I was treated like any other pregnant mum and was not left to get on with it because he was my fifth.

What I would like to tell other mums is to walk around as much as you can while you are in labour. It really does help a lot. I went into hospital and gave birth 35 minutes after I got there and I'm convinced it was an easy birth because of staying mobile. I had read about this but this was the first time I'd tried it. Also I live in Shetland and you might think it is the back of beyond but the midwives are fantastic and listen to you and also you get to meet a lot of them before you give birth so the chances of knowing your midwife when you go in are really high. I was lucky enough to have the same midwife deliver my fourth and fifth son and if I have any more I would like her to deliver me again."

Donna

I am quite a laid-back kind of person and my first pregnancy reflected that. I decided that I would opt for a mobile labour with minimal pain relief (thinking naively I wouldn't need it!).

Despite the somewhat 'different' labour the whole experience was pretty good, mainly due to the hospital's care ( Newcastle RVI). It couldn't have been that bad as I have just had a 2nd baby, Jessica, at the same hospital by elective caesarian.

Helen

As part of the initial development of the site we interviewed a number of mums about their birth experiences. Here's a summary of what they said:

The standard of care offered to mothers appears to differ markedly from hospital trust to trust that no one can be sure they will get the care they need. A number of the mothers said that they wished they had known more about the problems, complications that can arise during pregnancy. They felt that their ignorance, when problems arose, made it more frightening for them and their partners as they had no idea if the care they were receiving was appropriate.

Brenda lost 2 children in 4 years. Both pregnancies had got beyond 30 weeks. One child was lost due to pre-eclampsia. Her blood pressure was monitored as being very high but she was still sent home that night only to be rushed in hours later. The placenta had completely broken down and she lost the child. She wishes she had known the true risks of pre-eclampsia at the time so she could have insisted on being kept in hospital and monitored through the night.

The whole process of 'rooming in' was criticised. Even the women who had caesareans or very complicated natural births were given no time to recover on their own. Their new-borns were with them all the time. While this is an important bonding time, most mothers personally would have liked even a hour or two on their own between feeds, just to get some sleep. Whether this policy is for the benefit of mothers or because resources are too scarce to offer anything different is a moot point.

Also, the amount of time in women spent in hospital after the birth was an issue. Most mothers want to get home ASAP after the birth, especially if they have other children at home, but for first time mums extra time in hospital can be valuable. Very often this is not offered, although this is not always the case. One first time mother was offered extra time at another hospital of her choice after a bad experience at the birthing hospital. These extra 3 days at the other hospital was extremely valuable to her and helped her to feel happier about going home. She felt that if she had been forced home earlier she would have suffered from postnatal depression. Unfortunately, the offer of extra hospital time is not available to all women.

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